~The Little Blog of Happiness~

Bye-bye Melbourne, hello BORNEO!

2011-11-18T08:21:00.001+11:00

Hi all,
I'm off to Borneo tomorrow at 1am! We're doing two weeks hiking, one week in a community and spending one week on the beach! I'm so pumped. I've been saving for this trip for forever and I think it'll be a fantastic adventure.

I'll let you know how it all goes when I get back.
Take care in the mean time.
Love,
Erimentha xxx

On consolation.

2011-11-01T18:57:00.000+11:00

"I am not trying to bring you ease and I do not seek to minimize the disaster you have suffered: if fate is conquered by tears, let us muster them to shed; let every day pass amid grief, let sleepless melancholy consume the night; let blows rain down on our bleeding chests and our very faces feel their violence, if it will serve our purpose, let grief practice every kind of savagery. But if not amount of wailing recalls the dead, if all distress is powerless to alter a fate that is unchangeable and fixed for ever, if death holds fast whatever it has carried away, let sorrow, which runs its course, cease." - Seneca

this week.

2011-10-22T00:45:00.001+11:00

this week i cried in class.
one of my teachers told me that she spent a year 12 double period in the fetal position under the table.
i cried (and cry at the subsequent thought of this) because i don't like that one of my most admired mentors can be reduced to that. and also, that image is exactly how i've felt all year.

this week i laughed so hard it hurt my chest.
one of my friends was saying the word "look" too much and our stories kept interrupting each other until
we were slightly hysterial and running 50 minutes late.

this week i woke up in the middle of the night because
one (or both) of my lungs wouldn't let oxygen in.
it scared me so much, but there wasn't much i could do except wait it out.

this week i had four sacs (tests).
my family kept expecting me to freak out
but to be honest, i needed the work to distract me from everything else.

this week i tried to write everything down (i have about four blogger drafts saved).
my friend wants us to enter in a competition for spoken word
except everything i write sounds so cliched and i never can explain how much everything hurts.

this week i talked to a beautiful friend of mine who is going through a stressful time.
she said she has never been happier or sadder in her life, and wondered how this could be.
i like the way she explained the delicacy of kissing (she sounded so in love).

this week i got officially diagnosed with a medical condition.
my mum sat there and her hands shook like an old wooden house by the sea
while i stood there relieved that i could finally name this stupid thing which i just call "the flu".

this week i stopped feeling guilty. i made an effort to acknowledge the people i love. i tried to keep up with everything even though i'm dead tired and my ears kept switching off. i made several chocolate milkshakes and devoured so much bread. this week was hard on all of us.

i hope everyone has a nice weekend!
much love and thank-you for your sweet sweet comments,
eri, xxx.

So I quit my ramblin' & came home.

2011-09-29T19:15:00.000+10:00

Hello you,
Sorry it's been so long. And by so long, I mean, so long since I've done a talking post. Life is alright at the moment. It's term 3 school holidays which pretty much consists of studying, working and dinners with friends. The weather has been crazy lately, yesterday it was thundering and today is was gusting like there is no tomorrow. Next week I'm going away with my primary school friends to Phillip Island. We're camping and I'm really looking forward to spending some time away with easy-going friends and easy-going problems.

I studied for my psychology exam in the state library today. It was really nice, we went to the room on the 3rd story which had a huge high ceiling and books everywhere. On my way home I found a piece of paper on the ground of the train station. It seemed very fitting to publish it on my blog. It's a list. Lists are one of my favourite things in the world. When I grow up, I want to perfect the art of list writing. I wish I could write a whole book of lists. I think we are always more honest and less convoluted in dot point form. But maybe that's just me. Anyway, here is the list I found...

goals.
be a non smoker
learn Samba
Master douching + high quality (black) equitment.
Anna Schwarts Gallery
shows every 3 months
ute
to be punch fucked
exchange overseas
ideal perfect home (with privacy)
ideal perfect studio (with space)
able to work effectively in my studio
earning $1200 cash a week
tattooed
holiday destinations with Jonathan
Austria
Berlin (Markus)
France (Rodin)
deposit on a house
nose job
holiday in Perth
book for Jonathan
chook feeder for mum
discover breathing
meditate at least once a day
learning photography - and SLR camera
bonsai tree
follow the football
drive somewhere beautiful with Jonathan
a dog like susie
fillers in my cheeks
network of artists who support my practice
friends that inspire me
diving @ Great Barrier Reef
travel to a non European country

Much love,

Erimentha xxx

wake me up when september ends.

2011-09-22T21:10:00.000+10:00

Green Day lead singer Billie Joe Armstrong wrote this song about his father, who died of cancer on September 1st, 1982. At his father's funeral, Billie cried, ran home and locked himself in his room. When his mother got home and knocked on the door to Billie's room, Billie simply said, "Wake me up when September ends," hence the title.

Wake me up when this all ends.

2011.

2011-09-09T21:09:00.000+10:00

image

January had me hopeful

February is never good

March was a mess

April was anxious

May had me weepin'

June let me take a breath

July felt like a dream

August gave me mixed-messages

September fucked me over.

And here we are.

The twelfth child.

2011-09-08T21:26:00.001+10:00

"There was once upon a time a king and queen who lived happily together, and they had twelve children, all of whom were boys. One day the king said to his wife, 'If our thirteenth child is a girl, all her twelve brothers must die, so that she may be very rich and the kingdom hers alone.' Then he ordered twelve coffins to be made, and he filled them with shavings and placed a little pillow in each. These he put away in an empty room and, giving the key to his wife, he bade her tell no one of it.

The queen grieved and refused to be comforted; so much so that the youngest boy, Benjamin, who was always with her said to her one day: 'Dear Mother, why are you so sad?' 'My child,' she answered, 'I may not tell you the reason.' But he left her no peace, till she unlocked the room and showed him the twelve coffins filled with shavings, and with a little pillow laid in each. Then she said: 'My dearest Benjamin, your father has ordered that if I bring a girl into the world you are all to be buried in them.' She wept bitterly as she spoke, but her son comforted her and said: 'Don't cry, dear Mother. We'll manage to escape somehow and will fly for our lives."

-The Red Fairy Book, Andrew Lang.

september sun.

2011-09-01T08:24:00.002+10:00

Things that make me upset/things I don’t like:

-Criticism of any kind (even constructive)

-Feeling dizzy/faint

-Time pressure

-People in authority

-Being in the wrong

-People reading my writing (except S)

-Unspoken sadness/anger

-Paranoia

-Overwhelming tasks

-Being unable to grasp a concept, despite your best efforts

-People who are overly nice so it feels focused

-Unknown causes of distress (ie. when you can’t name the worry)

-Forgetting something

-Not completing something on a list of ‘things to do’

-When I am forced to talk to people who intimidate me

-Those days where I physically cannot look people in the eye

-Waking up in pain

-Studying in pain

-Becoming upset after prolonged pain

-Needles

-Avoiding topics

-Selective secrets

-When I am accidently a bitch and I don’t know how to make the moment better

-Unjustified blame

-When I have passive aggressive fights with people and all I want to do is cry

-“Your body is a battle ground”

-When people comment on your weight

-Utter exhaustion

Things that make me happy/things I like:

-4-lens photos

-Good weather

-Dancing to pop music

-Secret alcoves

-Boys who aren’t supposed to be attractive, but are

-Cappuccinos

-Letters from Swedan

-The colour teal

-Shared experiences with acquaintances

-Newly found eye-shadow

-Mermaids

-Alliteration

-Interesting shot-glasses

-Ireland

-BBC TV shows which I turn into autobiographies

-Recovery

-When my brother treats me like I am a person, rather than an opponent in mental rugby

-Watching someone’s face when they talk about their lover

-When the sisterly and motherly figures in my life re-emerge

-When you can say, “look at what we had” instead of “look at what we lost”

Things which are neither here nor there:

-Hysterical hand holding

-Sick bay becoming a strongly discouraged option

-Relationships that fade

-Dreading/anticipating Borneo

-When you fall asleep exhausted and don’t wake till morning

-The month of September

-Studying for psychology

-My bedroom

-My friend Jemima

-My weekend plans

-My distinct resentment to everything which is school

-Getting drunk

-My hair

-Both sets of grandparents

-Studying Chinese

-Balbasaw, the Pokemon

-Diamond cricket

-46

Cassie's therapy video, August 2011

2011-08-17T17:52:00.008+10:00

Hello there,

Cassie's therapy tag is a tag I started ages ago. It's really fun to do and I find it really interesting to look back on. The tag is based on a TV show called Skins and is a therapy video for one of the character's called Cassie. If you haven't seen it, please watch it HERE .

This month I tag. . .

Everyone & anyone who is interested! Sorry for being lazy guys, but I thought I'd open it up to anyone at all. Just drop me a line if you want to do it, because I'd love to read it too! :)

The task is: fill in 12 likes, 1 love and 8 hates like Cassie in her therapy video. Below, the bolded things are what you MUST include. Also, please make sure you link it back to me, and link it onto 3 other blogs you admire!

Abracadabra, Wow!
I like boys with cute side-way glances and girls who don't realize how beautiful they are
I like going to expensive shops and trying on crazy outfits
I like reading poetic texts in literature
I like when my boss compliments me
I like getting paid for something you love (babysitting in particular)
I like when people are a little gentler with you when they know you're going through a rough time

I like when you realize someone is a good hugger
I like how refreshed you feel after a shower
I like when you talk to one of your friends who you haven't seen in a while, and you remember why you love them so much
I like making mix CDs for my friends
I like my morning routine
I like buying bargain $5 'slutty-but-not' tops on Brunswick St.
I love how much PE improves my mental state compared to maths methods
Today I had lunch and went shopping with my old Bus Buddies. Quote; "this is the most fun I've had in months."

In some ways, I love everything.
Its less, its less of a thing to like, its less distinct, its less particular
I like things that I like but I love everything
There’s more choice in like
Cos even the worst things have things you love in them
I don’t know what you mean about things I hate
I hate when my mum is home all the time
I hate working 3 days in a row
I hate when there is no cause, just "generalised" pain
I hate cancelled tests when you have studied
I hate when people accuse me of unjustified love, in any form
I hate dreams that are really accurate to how you are feeling
I hate days that start badly, but in a way, sometimes they end well

I hate thinking it would be better if you started crying, but being unable to

I hate having to write 'to do' lists for things you've already done

I hate this, wow. Sorry.

set-up shots = new obsession.

2011-08-02T13:06:00.007+10:00

Hi all,

So, I'm home sick with the F L U.

It's awful.

& all I want to do is take photos of my favourite possessions from above.

I'm obsessed.

If anyone knows where I can find more images like the ones below, please let me know!

Thank-you,

Eri xxx

FOREVER IS COMPOSED OF NOWS.

2011-07-19T18:21:00.008+10:00

Hello everyone,

Sorry it's been so long since my last post! I had a fantastic time with my friend Mags who was visiting from Swedan. I also went to Sydney and Morington in the school holidays which was lots of fun. Felicity tagged me in this brilliant blogger tag which I really would love to spread around the blogger world! Felicity created this tag herself, so it's pretty special. Basically, you write a letter which must begin with "Dear you" and not include any names (just pronouns). It can cover any topic under the sun. I would like to spread the love to...1) Jamila 2) Katherine & 3) Red Boots. Good luck guys, xxx.

19/7/2011

Dear you,

I haven’t heard from you in a while. But that’s okay. I’m still gonna expect my birthday present. You never did forget it and tomorrow, being my birthday, is no exception. Every single birthday as far as I can remember I had a little white bubble wrap parcel sitting on my desk for my birthday or under the tree for Christmas. Even when you were in hospital I still got a gorgeous set of paints and a hand written card. I still remember your birthday card to me last year, ‘Happy birthday Gorgeous! I can’t believe your 16 already…write more soon. I love you too’. A lot has happened since then. I think life keeps on stripping me of my naivety, because each month that I live I keep thinking how stupid I was the month before. Why did I have that much hope or faith? What was I thinking?

Remember when you told me that being a teenager was the hardest years of your life? No adult had ever told me that before, but I’m glad you did. It’s so true. I didn’t realize the capacity we humans have for pain. And I overestimated the capacity humans have for love.

I’m not sure what you’d say to me as we are 6 months into 2011. On 12 months on from my last birthday. I know you’d be proud of me, you always were. And I know you’d be supportive of my decisions. You’d probably just tell me everything will be okay—but in a way that I could actually believe it.

I’ve been missing you. I didn’t get to tell you about my B+ on my saxophone exam, I didn’t get to tell you what happened to cheeky smile guy, or tell you more about Borneo and all the adventures I am yet to embark on. I could have told you about the divine girl I babysit called Lilly who makes me happier than anyone else I know. I might have told you all the things that people make me promise not to tell anyone else, because darling, you are the only exception. I would have told you about green vines, the best chai latte in Melbourne, seeing Tinpan Orange live in a Church and maybe I would have mentioned just as many happy things as sad things.

Wistfully awaiting your reply and attached present.

All my love,

The question I keep asking myself:

2011-06-26T16:20:00.002+10:00

What is the difference between an angsty teenager and real life problems? Will we all just look back on these years and laugh? Or will they still hurt us the way they do now?

one of the things that makes me indescribably happy...

2011-06-19T20:03:00.015+10:00

is famous people in photobooths.

(especially featuring my favourite stars)

really wanna watch this movie right now.

2011-06-12T13:35:00.002+10:00

"Love, actually is all around"

everything is for next wednesday.

2011-06-08T08:15:00.007+10:00

Exams.

It's hard to understand the gravity of my Year 12 Psychology exam on the 15th, but also have it in perspective. I've worked out that over the next week I could be doing up to 38 hours of studying. And at worst, 30. I think this has been the hardest I've ever studied for something in my life! I've been making flash cards, mind maps, notes, posters, reading over and over things, doing practice exams and questions from my textbook. Hopefully all these things will result in a good score on my exam. Today I'm going to go to the State Library and study, wearing my new big blue shirt for good luck.

It's a good thing I have so many good things to look forward to when exams finish. Including:

*My friend Mags (who lives in Swedan) is coming to Australia for 2 weeks. We plan to go surfing, go shopping, have sleepovers and maybe a party or two. I can't wait!

*My family is also thinking of going to Sydney in the holidays, and I might be able to meet up with M or JJ

*It's Hagrid's birthday on the 14th, and on the holidays we might be staying for a couple of days at her holiday house near the beach. Our group is getting so big now, I hope it's going to be the best group holiday yet :)

*And as if that wasn't enough, I'll be babysitting gorgeous L-M, shopping with Zhi Hui, hair dying with Sanchezzy and maybe a movie with Goose.

Can't be happy around exam time? CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

hurricane to rainbow.

2011-06-04T19:32:00.005+10:00

1: You are a hero.

2: Huh?

1: A true hero. I don’t know how you do what you do

2: Do what?

1: Fix everybody.

2: It’s not like I try and fix everybody!

1: Yeah you do. It’s in your nature. You’re the fix-it-upper.

2: You make me sound like a meddler

1: Bordering on meddler. When you were a kid you were always fixing things. Things that didn’t need fixing.

winter wants.

2011-05-30T18:48:00.008+10:00

At the moment I'm loving the fashion style of Perth's designer Ebony Harding, with her label 'Little Gracie'. Her design inspiration are ruffles, nature (especially flowers), femine colours and tasteful vintage. I hope she makes it really big one day soon.

My winter wants:

*New fudge hair dye (maybe aquamarine)

*Black boots

*Sportsgirl nail polish

*Nice expensive jeans

*A new beautifully tailored (and bright!) winter coat

*Long sleeve dress

*A black skirt

Thanks to this lovely blog for the inspiration of this post.

cassie's therapy video, may 2011.

2011-05-23T20:07:00.004+10:00

Hello there,

Cassie's therapy tag is a tag I started ages ago, I love it and find it really fun to look back on or think about. The tag is based on a TV show called Skins and is a therapy video for one of the character's called Cassie. If you haven't seen it, please watch itHERE .

This month I tag. . .

Mel-a blog I'd like to model mine on
Zaira-whose blog I loved the moment I saw it

Megan-just for fun, because she was the last person to follow me

The task is: fill in 12 likes, 1 love and 8 hates like Cassie in her therapy video. Below, the bolded things are what you MUST include. Also, please make sure you link it back to me, and link it onto 3 other blogs you admire!

Abracadabra, Wow!
I like boys with who treat you like big sisters and girls who can't help but be nice
I like frost on the grass
I like showers at 6.30am
I like falling asleep on people's shoulders
I like being a sore loser
I like silk pajamas

I like sing-a-longs
I like 2 page texts
I like when all awkwardness leeks away
I like realizing someone else is the same kind of fucked up as you are
I like being really proud of my school band
I like shopping online
I love putting my hair in a bun
Today I went back to school after 5 blissful days away in Canberra
In some ways, I love everything.
Its less, its less of a thing to like, its less distinct, its less particular
I like things that I like but I love everything
There’s more choice in like
Cos even the worst things have things you love in them
I don’t know what you mean about things I hate
I hate when you accidently offend/upset someone
I hate being weirdly protective of people
I hate how my brother slams doors
I hate eating meat
I hate cramming for a test
I hate the way my brain works
I hate people who pretend everything's okay, but in a way, that's the coping mechanism I use too

I hate cracked lips and bruised knees

I hate when people don't listen to what you have to say

I hate this, wow. . .Sorry.

my entry for wjdkyy:

2011-05-22T15:46:00.001+10:00

You know that game when you hold your breath under water for as long as you can? said the girl. The little boy replied, I don't like that game. Why not? asked the girl, looking at her friends sandy coloured hair with a hint of twelve year old love. My cousin Tess did that last Summer but never came up, said the boy.

And so the two friends sat together and thought about beautiful Tess who had forgotten to breathe one day and was never seen again. They keep her ashes on our mantelpiece, says the boy. We don't want her to go near water again.

This is my entry to join the blog WJDKYY, wonderful founder named Sanchez. Other bloggers are encouraged to enter as well, entries close tomorrow so be quick! xxx

all these villains.

2011-05-14T16:48:00.012+10:00

pic.

He comes every so often. The magic monster.

It's strange because even though I dread his company, I enjoy the sadness he brings.

He insists I take out all my long-lost memories. He unpacks them from his satchel. He suggests I take out all my old letters, childhood paintings and embarrassing moments. He takes great pleasure in asking disastrous 'what if' questions. He snuggles up too close for me to sleep and makes the doona lumpy. The magic monster is a guest I must welcome into my house, despite my desire never to see him again.

But the funny thing is, when the magic monster leaves and I am alone again, I miss him. I attempt to re-create his distorted beauty. It's kind of fun to wallow sometimes.

I've decided to make friends with my magic monster.

He is invited to my house anytime, as long as he brings something to eat (I'm suggesting sour straps).

paintings from '08, a cage of birds & you.

2011-05-09T20:50:00.010+10:00

I'm really happy tonight.

I think it's because I had a really good week last week. Friends were good, homework was manageable and work was fun.

All last week I was so angry at my parents. Sometimes my mum just says the dumbest and most hurtful things. But since the weekend we've been getting on just swell. Mum and I are both buying discounted bras from Victoria Secret and I think we're going out for breakfast before my Dr's appointment on Friday. We've tots bonded baby.

I think it's because my grandpa has recently been put into a nursing home. I have tried to be as supportive as I can because it makes her really upset. When we saw him on Sunday we hung my painting of a peacock on his wall and he told me that was his favourite animal (which I already knew). We also hung a photo of his mother from when she was 12 in Sri Lanka. He loved it. He has dementia so he repeats things over and over and gets very confused. The nurses told him he had to be in the nursing home because my grandma is in hospital, which is a lie. I felt so awful when he asked what hospital. I don't know why we can't just tell him that she can't look after him anymore.

When we left I gave Mum a kiss on the cheek because I knew it was hard for her. And ever since then she has been really nice. She even stopped on the way home to buy me a Big M which I had been craving since 9 o'clock in the morning.

I hope things remain like this for a while. I am content.

ps. thank you to clarice bean for her thoughtful text. i love people who text you just to say they care.

my life, my future.

2011-05-04T18:25:00.010+10:00

I don't know what I want to do with my life. All I knew is I don't want this.

I don't want exams upon exams. I don't care who fought what war and which angle is the greatest. I don't even want to go to Uni. I just want to be left alone. To have "a year for myself, not my future".

But they keep telling me to make something great of my life, to achieve my full potential. Except I'm scared that my full potential would show once and for all that I'm not good at anything except caring too much.

what to say? {8}

2011-04-28T20:37:00.009+10:00

Hello there,

Thank-you to everybody who gave me encouragement a few posts back. You guys make me smile so much. Thank you again.

Today I thought I'd do something a bit new for me. But not very new for Sanchezzy! Right now her whole blog is based on publishing posts 50 days after so wrote them. I have a 'What To Say' blog saved since the 20th of December 2010 that I wanted to post today. So thanks Sanchez for sort of inspiring me to post this. It's really surreal to see what was important to me, or what I wanted to say then (which is basically the whole idea behind 'What To Say'). I hope you enjoy.

Much love,

Erimentha xxx

To my friends who I've missed while they've been away;;

To my mum (about housework);;

To Jess;;

To Sanchez;;

To J;;

To Zhi Hui;;

To homophobes (and for lols);;

To Belle;;

To myself;;

To my glitter girl;;

& just because they make me smile or give me some comfort...

ps. picture credits to weheartit & wjdkyy.

box of stars.

2011-04-22T18:48:00.007+10:00

“Caddy got the box and set it on the floor and opened it. It was full of stars. When I was still, they were still. When I moved, they glinted and sparkled. I hushed”. –The Sound & The Fury, by William Faulkner

“The box of stars is the perfect metaphor for Caddy. Bright and burning. But she is closed off in a dark claustrophobic place, yet she is lighting everyone up around her”.-Parenthood

I really love this. I can't really explain why.

I guess, in a certain way, I'd like to have a box of stars too.

a postcard in a plane crash {2}

2011-04-14T20:00:00.010+10:00

dear followers,

i'm sorry i haven't been posting much. the problem is, this is 'the little blog of happiness', and while i'm not unhappy, i don't really know what to post that is happy. do i write a million lists about the things that make my day? do i post lots of cool and happy things? or do i write about what i have been up to? none of them seem adequate. and i find myself either being way too angsty or too forced. so my dilemma is: do i allow this blog to become 'the little blog of reflection'? or do i take a break until i remember how to post like i used to? i'd appreciate your thoughts please.

so while we reflect on the above, i thought i'd reintroduce myself in alfie's old tag. the idea is to write a postcard/letter to yourself. i did it way back then.

dear erimentha,

i can think of many things that i like about you. but i don't want you to overanalyze them as faults. you need to stop being so hard on yourself. you need to stop seeing all your personality traits as flaws. you need to stop saying "don't you fucking dare, god" in your head, and start saying "come on then, i dare you!". you need to remember that people always understand nothing, but much more than you can imagine.

i like how you listen and how you know what's important to people. i like your three favourite material possessions; red moleskin, tea cup with 'erimentha' painted on and a box of letters going back years and years. i think it will only get better my love.

take care,

eri xxx

p.s. "If you remember me, then I don't care if everybody else forgets"-Haruki Murakami

the starry night, van gogh.

2011-04-03T18:54:00.006+10:00

it's official. i'm obsessed.

"As the year of 1888 came to an end, Vincent traveled to Saint-Rémy-de-Provence where he committed himself to an asylum. Here his paintings became a torrent of activity. Although he could not draw and paint for long periods of time without suffering from an attack, he managed to create The Starry Night which resides as his most popular work and one of the most influence pieces in history. The swirling lines of the sky are a possible representation of his mental state. This same shaken style is visible in all of his work during his time in the asylum."

a little prayer.

2011-03-30T21:59:00.005+11:00

Dear God,

Give comfort and peace to those who are separated from loved ones. May the ache in their hearts by the strengthening of their hearts. May their longing bring resolve to their lives, conviction and purity to their love. Teach them to embrace their sadness lest it turn to despair. Transform their yearning into wisdom. Let their hearts grow fonder.

AMEN.

" -Leunig.

this photo sums up me & my mum's entire relationship:

2011-03-28T10:32:00.006+11:00

new month resolutions:

2011-03-26T22:06:00.010+11:00

-Stop lying to my parents just because I think they will say no, or just because it's easier. Tell the truth, for fuck sake Eri!

-Stop making external changes to match internal ones, unless it's an ear piercing for M's birthday ;)

-Get me & Zhi Hui's 4-lens camera developed

-Start doing homework every night, instead of giving up and doing nothing

-Feel more grounded

-Be able to explain things so people understand

-Don't let people down

-Be an anti-depressant, just like other people are my happiness drugs

-Practice sax so I have some chance of impressing Mr. Tumnus

-Spend more time in sexy purple expensive (but very worth it) dress and less time in school uniform

-Spend more time feeling content & loved, like on Friday night ©

Diary entry, 5/12/10:

Girls like to talk about things, boys like to fix things.

I like both. I want to talk, then fix.

But lots of things you can't fix. God knows I try.

I keep thinking and solving, working slowly on a solution.

But most of the problems I have have no solution. So I always end back at square one.

keeping faith.

2011-03-22T20:15:00.003+11:00

this picture is wrong.

right now, hope seems so much closer than it's ever been.

carey mulligan.

2011-03-21T20:11:00.004+11:00

I FUCKING LOVE HER FACE.

IT'S SO EXPRESSIVE & CUTE.

ANYONE AGREE?

{she reminds me of gem stone so much}

my week in pictures...

2011-03-17T18:21:00.003+11:00

Monday: (brain dies from psych revision overload)

Tuesday: (chattin' the silly & sometimes serious stuff, at work)

Wednesday: (much missed 'tea & sympathy' with K)

Thursday: (snuggle with Z-H & S)

& then...

Friday: (zumba class with Hagrid)

Saturday: (Borneo training camp)

Sunday: (Borneo training camp II)

my goal:

2011-03-12T18:14:00.002+11:00

'the greatest'

2011-03-10T20:36:00.000+11:00

FAVOURITE MOVIE EVER.

cassie's therapy video, march 2011;

2011-03-07T18:11:00.006+11:00

Hello lovelies,
Cassie's therapy tag is a tag I started ages ago, I love it and find it really fun to look back on or think about. The tag is based on a TV show called Skins and is a therapy video for one of the character's called Cassie. If you haven't seen it, please watch it HERE.

This month I tag. . .

Rosa-a very talented blogger!
Francesca-because her blog is always beautiful

Abby-because her blog is oh so fun

The task is: fill in 12 likes, 1 love and 8 hates like Cassie in her therapy video. Below, the bolded things are what you MUST include. Also, please make sure you link it back to me, and link it onto 3 other blogs you admire!

Abracadabra, Wow!
I like boys with big smiles just for you and girls who ask the right questions
I like tie-dyed t-shirts
I like writing lists to remind me of you
I like when some people are like anti-depressants
I like new friends and new members to our group
I like being the highlighting and annotating queen

I like silly in-jokes
I like maple syrup
I like the names Riley and Jemima
I like singing E.T. by Katy Perry
I like the level of religiousness of watching 'New Tricks' every Friday
I like my four-lens which I share with Zhi Hui
I love how beautiful Mars is
Today I tried to do homework and failed miserably
In some ways, I love everything.
Its less, its less of a thing to like, its less distinct, its less particular
I like things that I like but I love everything
There’s more choice in like
Cos even the worst things have things you love in them
I don’t know what you mean about things I hate
I hate when your bad day turns into a bad month, and then a bad year
I hate lasagna that makes you feel sick
I hate having to censor the truth
I hate discussions with stupid teenage boys about stupid teenage girls
I hate people who make generational comments about iPhones
I hate people who say "you obviously have a lot on your plate", "don't stress" or "it's not your responsibility"
I hate homework, but in a way, what else would I do everyday?

I hate when my dad uses his angry voice and you know there is no arguing with him

I hate when something becomes more and more upsetting the more you think about it
I hate this, wow. . .Sorry.

a pinwheel of emotions,

2011-03-03T18:15:00.006+11:00

My mum has the amazing ability of turning every stressful aspect in our lives into her problem, and only hers. Not even my health is my problem, it is her stress, her worry. It makes me so fucking angry.

Luckily this gorgeous combination of clothes makes me so fucking happy:

one of these days..

2011-03-02T17:58:00.009+11:00

.x.x.x.

23

2011-02-23T18:24:00.004+11:00

classics assignment, what is a hero?

2011-02-19T14:47:00.006+11:00

a hero is somebody who:

*does things even when they are scared

*does things even though they know they will not succeed

*does things you, or others, admire

*puts others before themselves

*achieves extraordinary things under unfortunate circumstances

*makes un-cool things really ridiculously cool

*is determined, courageous, brave, etc.

*admits they don't have the answers, but tries to find them anyway

*everyone pales in comparison to the hero

a hero is an example of how you would like to live for the rest of your life.

or who you would like to live the rest of your life for.

best free feelings:

2011-02-16T18:27:00.003+11:00

-Those quiet moments laced with sadness (when the sadness doesn't hurt you)

-Explaining why you love someone, to someone you love

-Dying a streak of your hair pink

-When you look amazing on public transport

-When work friends start feeling like family

-When your best friend knows you better than you know yourself

-When the owner of all of Melbourne’s black and white photo booths pays for you and your brother to have a turn

-Sticking your head out of a car window

-Drinking lemonade in the shower

-When you’re just the right height to hug someone

-When you love someone with all your heart and there is no chance they will die

-When small inanimate objects bring you immerse comfort

-Writing with a nib pen

-When certain things become “yours” and people say, “that’s so Erimentha!” (Okay so I also absolutely hate this, but when that thing is so absolutely you, then it does feel fantastic)

-When you can wear something your grandma gave you everyday of the week

-When you find out your favourite bus driver used to be a Latin dance teacher

FUCK YEAH NEW INTERNET.

(and apologies it's been so long)

2011-01-24T16:41:00.000+11:00

STYLE ICONS:

featuring: zooey deschanel, samantha harris, patti smith, rachel antonoff's design & unknown cool people. x

still here.

2011-01-22T17:22:00.007+11:00

hello you,

sorry, i haven't disappeared. just enjoying my holidays. i will be getting back to blogging very soon. in the meantime, does anyone know where this awesome series of photos came from? is it an editorial? i found them on weheartit and fell in love. they are so youthful, fun and carefree.

take care,

eri xoxo

merry christmas everyone!

2010-12-25T18:51:00.008+11:00

merry christmas all! hope you have a fantastic day filled with food, family, presents and joy!

your present from me is a collection of postsecrets over this year that have made me smile, think or i have simply loved...

(this is what i hope for in my future career)

(for maggie moo)

(reminds me of J)

(reminds me of an a&j song, depressing but interesting)

(reminds me of me, so much!)

(i do this too)

(just because it's cute)

(good message)

(dear god, this postsecret sums me up)

(for hildogga)

(& again)

(for my guy friends)

(reminds me of my sister who was stillborn. i don't resent her though)

(so sweet)

(reminds me of me, just not with 911)

(yes sir, this is a good one)

(reminds me of my dad)

(this is so something i would do!)

(i swear i make this promise every year)

(agreed)

(sanchez and i reckon this is one of the best postsecrets ever)

(i think everyone can understand this postsecret)

xoxo,

erimentha

ps. SOURCE>

interesting life experiences of eri (2):

2010-12-23T20:51:00.014+11:00

1. my friend ruby has an eating disorder. when she gets better she wants to get a tattoo of a blue butterfly, the symbol of the Butterfly Foundation, on her wrist. I want a tattoo for when I "get better" too. I just don't know what of.

2. I saw the hottie from the band 'Little Red' last night. He was wearing a Hawaiian t-shirt, jeans and boots. He looked amazing. Please. Have. Sex. With. Me. Now.

3. I brought a red moleskin a while ago. It's the most beautiful piece of stationary I've ever seen. I can't wait for 2011 when I can start filling it up with things to do, remember and people to see. Fuck 2010, bring on 2011 I say!!!

cassie's therapy video; december!

2010-12-20T20:34:00.008+11:00

This month I tag. . .
Athena-a very old blog inspiration of mine.
Lilah-a very new blog inspiration of mine.

Michelle-a very lovely blogger friend of mine.

The task is: fill in 12 likes, 1 love and 8 hates like Cassie in her therapy video. Below, the bolded things are what you MUST include. Also, please make sure you link it back to me, and link it onto 3 other blogs you admire!

Abracadabra, Wow!
I like boys with hipster t-shirts and girls who are always there
I like doing nothing with someone but still having fun
I like impulsive food choices
I like how the South Coast of NSW feels like home, and I got to show it to Z-H & S
I like looking at tumblrs of old friends
I like how someone just being in the country can make things better

I like sing-a-longs to Clare Bowditch
I like cuddle puddles
I like d&ms with work people
I like watching dance movies with my brother
I like the stage of friendship when everything is new and exciting and there are so many questions
I like stories about how people met
I love my new 'hope' necklace
Today I went to visit Mascara who has just had 6 teeth taken out!
In some ways, I love everything.
Its less, its less of a thing to like, its less distinct, its less particular
I like things that I like but I love everything
There’s more choice in like
Cos even the worst things have things you love in them
I don’t know what you mean about things I hate
I hate when feeling guilty when I complain (but still needing to complain)
I hate snobby private school people
I hate immature fights
I hate random shit in your past that you regret
I hate medication with annoying side-effects
I hate passive aggressive comments
I hate people who cry when they see you, but in a way, it's humbling

I hate when you really admire someone, but they hardly know you at all
I hate when your life feels like a Skins episode
I hate this, wow. . .Sorry.

vent list.

2010-12-14T16:33:00.010+11:00

Pros of this time of the year:

*Lots of catch ups and hang outs with friends

*Stay up late, then sleep in

*Get to be much more independent and do cool stuff

*Have more credit for an unknown reason

*Better fashion

*Room make-overs

*Lots of letters & contact with Maggie Moo

*Bonding time with Zhi Hui & Sanchezzy

*Massages from friends

*Ever growing collection of amazing pens & postsecrets

Cons of this time of year:

*Mother gets extremely stressed, leading to point two...

*Shit family dynamics

*Christmas shopping for relatives you don't like

*Dentist appointments

*Stop talking to people on the phone as much

*When you feel sick for no reason

*Over-emotional hellos & goodbyes

Neutrals of this time of year:

*Lots of reflection on 2010

*The weather

*Sense of detachment

*Parents develop a strong multiple personality complex, in which they easily agree to some arrangements and strongly appose others

summer update!

2010-12-04T18:49:00.008+11:00

Dear you,

Hope you are well, and you like my new header and side pictures :) I've been having a really good time lately. On Friday I went to the beach with my geography biffles; Sam, Shar and Marleen. We swam, bitched about parents and giggled about boys. Marleen is from Germany on exchange and she is such a sweet and interesting person. She has a great sense of humour, and we both understand each others jokes and ideas which I like.

Tomorrow I am off on a beautiful adventure to my grandparent's house in NSW with Zhi Hui & Sanchezzy. I am very excited, I just love the Summer! We are going to cook all our own meals, hang out at the beach, go for walks and generally have a ball!

I think this Summer is going to be the best yet! I am spending Christmas with my mums family in Melbourne, then going to the Coast with my friends (including Da Wai, Mars and Hagrid who have all been on exchange!), and then going back to NSW for New Years.

What are your plans for the holidays?

Lots of love,

Me, xx

i need you to need me (7)

2010-11-29T10:50:00.014+11:00

i want a boy who enjoys stillness

i want a boy for whom i'm not their back-up plan, but their only plan

i want a boy who looks at me like this:

i want a boy who isn't afraid to kiss in public places

i want a boy who is brave & supports me no matter what

i want a boy with a sense of adventure

i want a boy who knows what to do when shit gets real

what kind of boy do you want?

xxx, eri

ps. just for fun:

what to say? {7}

2010-11-27T09:32:00.002+11:00

Hi guys,

Today I thought I'd do a 'What To Say?' post. I've been doing it for ages, basically I just pick images and quotes that I want to say to my friends, family, or people I know. It's really fun. Feel free to have a try. And also, I want to say hello to Zaira, whose blog I love, and I think you will love too.

To God;;

To Grace;;

To the US government;;

To M;;

To Patti;;

To Sanchez;; (but not at her)

To everyone;;

To my childhood;;

To my little brother;;

To my mum;;

To Hagrid;;

To myself;;

To Zhi Hui;;

& just because I like it...

whipped.

2010-11-23T21:21:00.008+11:00

"My mum told me once about this crazy kid she worked with. He was a completely normal kid until he was nine, when his dad died. And even though obviously a lot of nine-year-olds have had a lot of dead fathers and most of the time the kids don't go crazy, I guess this kid was an exception.

So what he did was took a pencil and one of those steel compass things, and he started drawing circles onto a piece of paper. All the circles exactly two inches in diameter. And he would draw the circles until the entire piece of paper was completely black, and then he would get another piece of paper and draw more circles, and he did this every day, all day, and didn't pay attention in school and drew circles all over all of his tests and shit.

My mum said that the kid's problem was that he had created a routine to cope with his loss, only the routine became disruptive. So anyway, then my mum made him cry about his dad or whatever and the kid stopped drawing circles and presumably lived happily ever after.

But I think about the circles kid sometimes, because I can sort of understand him. I always like routine. I suppose I never found boredom very boring. I doubted I could explain it to someone like Margo, but drawing circles through life struck me as a kind of reasonable insanity."-Paper Towns, by John Green.

I like this quote...it's kind of creepy, intriguing and comforting at the same time. At least we're not mad enough to draw that many circles.

Hope all is well for you guys,

xo. Erimentha

ps. Continuing hair & amazingness aim:

fairyfloss saturdays

2010-11-20T09:13:00.006+11:00

"Tell me why things, change but feel the same. If life is such a game, how come people all act the same?"--M.I.A.

So...been having a bit of a blog rut lately. Sorry guys. Thought of writing lists, telling you about my life, complaining about exams, or doing a blog tag. All ideas rejected and lost. Do you want to see some yummy food I've been eating lately? I hardly ever post food pics! :O

A yummy lasagna I made with my mum:

A delicious spinach and feta pie, with spinach from our garden:

New Strawberries & Cream tea, a present for mum from me and my brother:

The tea:

The final lovely iced goodness:

Have a great weekend guys!

xoxo

Eri

love.

2010-11-16T20:02:00.004+11:00

"Death ends a life, not a relationship." -Morrie Schwartz

"When you learn how to die, you learn how to live." -Morrie Schwartz

"He loved her so much, he'd broke the law. And if they'd have caught him he'd have only loved her more" -Tinpan Orange lyrics

sick of being me.

2010-11-13T18:33:00.015+11:00

let's swap.

you can be me and i can be you.

my biggest worry will be a guy called Pie.

& my life will suddenly and inexplicity become easier.

while you will have trouble verbalising everything, have a phobia of giving directions and swing between the mood of tumbling over the edge, or perfectly happy;

i will enjoy hanging out with my friends, i will practice my lines for the school play and will excitedly look forward to the summer.

you will struggle with concentration and motivation,

while i will finish all assignments on task and get 100%.

you will be unable to think about the past, present or future.

while i will plan overseas holidays, and happily remember good times and bad.

my biggest worry will be which colour to paint my room.

your biggest worry will be that things will just keep getting worse.

darling, it would be really good if we could switch lives for a bit,

cuz right now I'm a little bit sick of being me.

xoxo,

erimentha

imagine--john lennon

2010-11-09T20:25:00.005+11:00

Imagine there's no Heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

look, listen, see, click, donate;;;november 2010

2010-11-07T12:19:00.015+11:00

What's happening in November you may ask? Well this is The Little Blog of Happiness's original idea for summing up the month ahead! Enjoy :)

Look;; New model love...Sasha Pivovarova. A Russian model, with features that remind me of Gemma Ward. She has appeared in many Vogues, as well as signing big deals with Prada, Christian Dior, Chanel, etc. She is really one to watch out for! I love her kooky shoots and style!

Listen;; To Chairlift, a band from the US. They have a fun and upbeat sound, key track 'Bruises'. Check out their Myspace here.

See;; If you live in Australia, I beg you to watch 'New Tricks' on ABC, Saturday nights at 7.30. My family treat 'New Tricks' like a religious event, never to be missed. I love the writers of 'New Tricks', the story-lines are always multilayer and the actors are brilliant. For more info click here.

Click;; Today we went out for Breakfast and I noticed as we walked past that the library window had been covered in pictures of birds, animals, words and patterns. Quite beautiful. The artist is called Chay-Ya Clancy and she has a blog called 'Drawings On Glass', click here. She is currently completing work at Flinders St Station, in the city of Melbourne. I like her idea.

Donate;; To Cystic Fibrosis, a genetic disease which causes infections and blockages of the lungs, as well as other organ problems. It is the most common life threatening illness for Australian children. To donate click here or support Cystic Fibrosis on Facebook, here.

a lovely long weekend.

2010-11-03T08:45:00.015+11:00

Hello.

So, quick life re-cap shall we?

I got a B+ on my exam. My examiner said I played with, "style with much insight musically", "a warm rich tone" and my "List B was commendable today in stylistic depth". Okay, I'm getting a bit full of myself right now ain't I? Let's just say I am very proud and move on :)
I had a good weekend. Had a couple of group dinners, one family one, worked a bit, it was Clarice Bean's 17th birthday, took Yoke for a walk, watched some O.C., read 5 Anne Fine books (a bit obsessed perhaps?) and realized for once I'd blown the internet downloads for the month. A first!
My all girls music group called is doing a cover of Lady GaGa's 'Bad Romance' and I'm Lady GaGa's part...it's so much fun!

I hope everyone else is doing well, thanks for all the congrats comments on my 2 years! :) It made me feel really special and happy, so thank you. It's hard to believe I'm really looking forward the next month. I know it's exams soon, but I just can't wait for Summer and all the little fun things in between! Overseas friends get back soon, and I'm expecting a letter from USA! WOOT!

Lots of love,

Erimentha xxx

ps. I think everyone should do this personality test, and then look up their results. It's tons of fun! I'm a ESTJ. We're studying this test in Psych right now. It's called the Myer Briggs test.

And now for the cutest animal ever...the emporah tamarin!

2 year blog anniversary,

2010-10-28T17:45:00.011+11:00

Hello.

Today it is 2 years since I started blogging!

Sometimes you look back at your life and you have regrets, embarrassing things you wish you could have erased. Well, my blog has definitely changed so much since I first started blogging way back in 2008. I don't like all of what I posted, but I still like old me. So below are some highlights and posts of interest that we can look back on, remember what I felt, remember what happened and take a trip down memory lane! Enjoy lovelies. Thank you for always supporting me! :)

A bit more about me:

*Meet me

*Meet me again!

*Meet my Dad

*Meet my Mum

Lists:

*Things I Believe In (2008)

*My perfect boy (2008)

*Things I Don't Understand (2009)

*Winter (2009)

*Wishes (2010)

*Facebook Groups That Should Exist (2010)

Moment in my life:

*My first job (2009)

*First meeting the women who inspired me (2009)

*Reflection (2009)

*Black & White photo obsession (2o10)

*Taylor Swift! (2010)

*Samantha Harris, love (2010)

First posts of blog regulars:

*First Cassie Tag (2009)

*First Look, Listen, See, Click, Donate (2009)

*First 'What To Say?' (2009)

*First Who Am I? (2009)

cassie's therapy tag; october, 2010

2010-10-26T19:18:00.004+11:00

Hello lovelies,

This month I tag:

*Felix, just because she is special

*Sabine Cara, because she is starting her blog a fresh

*Alycia, cuz she's sweet like that : )

Abracadabra, Wow!
I like boys with their dads flannel shirts, and girls who help me feel included
I like koala ears
I like purple nail polish
I like thunderstorms
I like people who look like Tin Tin
I like loud laughs
I like when my 90 year old grandpa beats my 12 year old brother in table tennis
I like playing 'pash, partner, punch, push off a cliff, pregnant & sex' during class
I like fish
I like getting fit again
I like people who find fun in the ordinary moments
I like when strangers understand the things you find hardest to convey
I love Mr. Lincoln roses, they are one of my favourite things in the whole wide world
Today I took my dog for a walk
In some ways, I love everything.
Its less, its less of a thing to like, its less distinct, its less particular
I like things that I like but I love everything
There’s more choice in like
Cos even the worst things have things you love in them
I don’t know what you mean about things I hate
I hate when you know you could have done better
I hate when people use their honesty as an excuse to be a bitch
I hate the prospect of memories being forgotten
I hate feeling shit for no reason
I hate spoilt kids who cry when don't get their way
I hate when people raise money for breast cancer so they can make boob cupcakes and dress skanky. I wish people thought childhood cancer was a "cool" cancer to raise money for
I hate people who say "FML" and have no need to, but in a way, I do that all the time, FML.
I hate when people are fake angry at me, because I take it to heart
I hate having dreams of breakdowns
I hate this, wow. . .Sorry.

"When I first met her, I knew in a moment I would have to spend the next few days re-arranging my mind so there’d be room for her to stay." *

my new exercise regime;

2010-10-24T17:26:00.007+11:00

People keep insinuating that I'm unfit, or worse, fat. Well maybe I should make the category of "people" smaller. My family keeps insinuating that I'm unfit, know nothing about sport, and need to "get my tone back". And at first I was like, umm fuck you? But this weekend I have decided that Summer is coming up, and although I know I'm not fat or unfit, I also know I'm not toned and fit.

So, I have decided to start a exercise regime. For most of last year I did back exercises every night for half an hour which helped my back to stop hurting by building core muscles strength. I now want those muscles back, because core muscles are what make your stomach flat, and thighs and arms toned. And I've also decided to start walking my dog 3 times a week on a circuit that takes 45 minutes.

Hopefully within about a month I can start to look amazing and ready for bathers in summer, and my new 70s jumpsuit I brought from Dear Gladys (I might have to show you it to you guys soon, it's simply the best).

I hope this exercise thing works, I'll be shit if I give up this in about a week. But I thought if I wrote it all down in a blog post it would remind me to keep it up.

Super hot girl going to climb mountains in Borneo, HERE WE COME!

Hope you all had a great weekend! Thanks for the support about my saxophone exam, I'm expecting results on Monday...aghh....

xxx,

Eri.

ps. laughed quite a lot when 'sport', 'exercise' and 'walking' wern't regular tags of mine...hmmm? Am I proving my families stupid point? Or are they just obsessed with my brothers goal to play cricket for Australia?

sax exam.

2010-10-22T21:07:00.013+11:00

Before exam:

Anticipation

–verb (used with object)

to realize beforehand; foretaste or foresee

After exam:

Relief.

–noun

alleviation, ease, or deliverance through the removal of pain,distress, oppression, etc

I want...

2010-10-21T16:50:00.013+11:00

I want her hair...

All buses to say this...

To do well on my sax exam tomorrow...

An eternity tattoo...

Spring to be sweeter...

& bright lipstick like this...